tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48149936247468114542024-03-13T15:00:17.332-07:00my thoughts.. my world..d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-50574036611525905832011-02-11T11:29:00.000-08:002011-02-11T11:35:01.411-08:00The Shadow!<div class="mbl notesBlogText clearfix"><div><p><em>Had receded into d inner recesses of my mind sum day..</em></p><p><em>Then somehow i lost the way..</em></p><p><em>And also the will..</em></p><p><em>May be i lacked d desire.. or just d skill..</em></p><p><em>M now just a shadow of the past..</em></p><p><em>Lost.. distorted.. distant.. n dark..</em></p><p><em>Sunless smiles.. fading blood smears..</em></p><p><em>Moderate hatred.. logical fears..</em></p><p><em>Words fail to reach it.. pain to penetrate..</em></p><p><em>Is this reason to cry out loud? or to celebrate?</em></p><p><em>Weird that even in this oblivious stupor</em></p><p><em>She can feel your jagged warm breath??</em></p><p><em>Will this result in her re-birth or d final death!</em></p><p><em>Is your love potent enuf to heal .. to revive??</em></p><p><em>True enuf to bring d specter back to light.. to love.. to life??</em></p></div></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-46123891372671181942011-01-03T09:18:00.000-08:002011-01-03T09:43:13.110-08:00reflections!<div class="clearfix note_content"><div><p><em>2010..</em></p><p><em>a year of dreams..</em></p><p><em>some realized.. some shattered!</em></p><p><em>a year of promises..</em></p><p><em>some fulfilled.. some broken n battered!</em></p><p><em>a year of love..</em></p><p><em>both lost.. n new!</em></p><p><em>a year of words..</em></p><p><em>spoken.. unspoken.. false.. some true!</em></p><p><em>a year of hope..</em></p><p><em>sometimes dead.. sometimes unfailing!</em></p><p><em>a year of faith..</em></p><p><em>sometimes deep-rooted.. sometimes ailing!</em></p><p><em>of learning.. pain.. growth.. n lessons..</em></p><p><em>of yearning.. longing.. separations.. obsessions.. </em></p><p><em>of light.. darkness.. secrets.. n confessions..</em></p><p><em>of miles.. distance.. of bridging gaps..</em></p><p><em>of myriad colors.. of grays.. n blacks..</em></p><p><em>of anxiety.. malady.. agony.. resilience..</em></p><p><em>of trials n tribulations.. achievement.. n experience..</em></p><p><em>of tranquility..solitude..lassitude..n flames..</em></p><p><em>of flesh.. blood.. bones.. n names..</em></p><p><em>of friendly strangers.. n strange friends..</em></p><p><em>a year that's gone.. yet one that never ends..</em></p><p><em>a year which over time n space transcends..</em></p></div></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-23378411143578000032010-06-12T21:38:00.000-07:002010-06-12T21:40:45.201-07:00!!<span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: rgb(51, 204, 255);"><span style="color: rgb(102, 102, 204);">Waiting eagerly 4 d sun 2 set.. 4 darkness 2 alight..<br />Bt these damn tears.. seem to glisten even more at night!!<br /></span></span></span>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-3768872988657475372010-05-16T23:43:00.000-07:002010-05-17T00:38:15.993-07:00Do u??<span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="font-style: italic;">Do u sometimes feel something gnawing at your heart??<br />Do u sometimes suddenly find your world falling apart??<br />Do u sometimes think midnight is an early hour to sleep??<br />Do u sometimes struggle to keep at bay d confusions deep??<br /><br />Do u have 2 try hard 2 keep sum part of u alive??<br />Do u sometimes feel d pain's too much.. tonight u won't survive??<br />Do u sometimes wonder how u of all cud bear so much pain??<br />Do u sometimes try not to try again n again??<br /><br />Do u sometimes wake up with a tear in your</span></span><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="font-style: italic;"> half-closed eyes??<br />Do u sometimes now forget to swallow hard wen sum1 lies??<br />Do u sometimes realize that u don't feel d raindrops anymore??<br /></span></span><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="font-style: italic;">Do u sometimes realize that it's being yourself that you most ignore??</span></span></div><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"><span style="font-style: italic;"><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-70399882885381353252010-03-30T02:39:00.000-07:002010-10-26T08:38:10.913-07:00transformations!!<span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">I hate to see d change<br />bt whom m i to blame?<br />u? me? thousand others?<br />hey who cares? no one bothers!<br />life moves on.. fast-paced.. glides!<br />trips sumtimes ovr d lies..<br />d smile's more frequent.. more plastic..<br />days pass.. nights.. nthng drastic..<br />u've canged.. n so hv i..<br />bt sumtimes.. jst sumtimes.. rarely..<br />i still do cry..<br />m still tryng to figure out..<br />wen exactly we bid good bye..<br />it's all different now.. 4 good or bad??<br />nah! m nt dat happy.. n obv nt dat sad..<br />hey! thr's no tracing back.. no about turn..<br />dis new so-called life.. hs jst begun!<br />feel d flow.. if u do still feel at all..<br />m too numb.. aftr d glorious fall..<br />silence hurts.. words scare..<br />yeah.. i knw.. nthng's evr fair!<br />jst dat sum1 sumtime<br />cud hv jst once cried out "beware"<br />hmmm.. bunk it! like all things i do..<br />not dat thr ws more i cud.. true..<br />well m nt evn sure whethr i wud want to..<br />so?! quit d thots.. wid time lets jst glide..<br />lets njoy (atleast try to) life's uneven ride!!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /></span></span></span><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-11969441240921285062010-03-08T00:00:00.000-08:002010-03-08T00:05:50.951-08:00all smiles.......<span style="color: rgb(102, 255, 255);"><span style="font-style: italic;">nthng complicated.... nthng much.. nthng new or xciting..<br />jst dat.. hd a nice day ystrday..<br />4 no reason..<br />still smiling!!!!! :)<span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"></span></span><br /><br /></span></span><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-89575912228198842442010-02-27T10:25:00.000-08:002010-02-27T22:31:16.817-08:00sometimes.. rarely.. hardly.. yet sometimes..<span style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">sumtimes.. u r jst happy..</span></span></span> <span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">it's a lil stupid coz dere's no reason to smile.. bt den isn't dat reason enuf?? n is it always necessary to hv a reason 4 evry lil thing?? c'mon u need dis.. n u deserve dis.. once in a while.. a silly lil smile.. without rhyme or reason.. a smile.. pure.. n divine..<br />makes things simple.. or may b complicated.. once u begin to ponder!! so, jst let it be.. who cares??<br />let d world.. d ppl.. d music.. d words.. d deeds.. d rationale b..<br />jst smile.. dis moment, dis happiness, dis joy, dis smile.. is only urs..<br />njoy ur command.. feel d warmth.. n dnt u dare think.. dnt u evn try to hold on to it..<br />transitory.. yes.. it is.. n dats y it's so beautiful..<br />dnt b scared.. let go.. jst b urself.. evn if it's for such few moments as dese..<br />wen.. U r simply U..<br /></span></span><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-92112813113564001992010-02-22T09:50:00.000-08:002010-02-22T11:13:40.567-08:00not now.. plz.. n nt again?!jst wen u thnk dat things r fine.. things r as u want them to b.. jst wen u re-read a sentence, smile n lift ur pen to add d dot (.) LIFE adds a comma (,) n u r expected to add moments, minutes, memories n words..<br />it's disgusting.. u cry out "it's nt fair"<br />bt then Life nvr is.. (n all fair things r so predictable, dry n boring!!)<br />bt den wat bothers u most is dat it's scary..<br />n hence u dnt wanna think abt it.. coz it sure gives u a fright.. dis realization.. dat U..<br />U who hd completely different plans.. U who hd worked so hard..<br />U who hd loved so much.. U who hd thot dat U hd nw grown strong enuf to let go..<br />U who hd learnt to dream, plan n execute..<br />hd some how forgotten to think abt failures.. had forgotten abt destiny.. d bigger power.. good or bad.. dunno.. bt defintely bigger!!<br />n hence change - deviation 4m wat u'd thot, wished, prayed for, hd nearly got.. gives u a shock.. to say d least..<br />r U angry or hurt?<br />is it anger or despair?<br />or simply excruciating pain? or r U numbed by disbelief?<br />1 more sleepless night? jst wen u wer thnking of curling up.. n divine sleep!<br />U hate it.. rite? n so do i.. Bt who cares?!<br />dis is d thought wic haunts u late at nite..<br />wic disturbs u in d morning, evn b4 u open ur eyes..<br />y me? y cudn't it b d othr way round? hw cud dis happen?<br />hate dese adamant hows n whys..<br />take up a lot of time.. n nvr tend to leave an answer wic makes sense..<br />bt then.. it's morning.. n it's brighter.. n ur nt scared anymore.. u love d light.. d fresh air.. d warmth.. d birds too (depends)..<br />u think afresh.. plan.. dream.. write another prayer..<br />bt d night leaves u disillusioned yet again..<br />y do v dream, wish, plan, pray again n again?<br />to feel d scattered shards cutting into d thin layers.. of skin n consciousness?<br />to feel d warm blood wen d darkness runs a chill down our spine?<br />No.. i guess not..<br />its wat v call innate, natural, human..<br />silly?! yup.. may b.. dunno.. yes.. sometimes..<br />or is dis wat we call Faith?!<br />intangible.. invincible!<br />d Bigger Power?!<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4814993624746811454.post-45770465288290913122010-02-22T07:35:00.000-08:002010-02-22T07:57:39.631-08:00beginnings..beginnings r always difficult..<br />mean.. dunno wer to begin with.. how do u start a conversation.. a journey.. a relationship..<br />endings r bitter, abrupt.. bt beginnings r more difficult.. some how..<br /><br /><br /><input id="gwProxy" type="hidden"><!--Session data--><input onclick="jsCall();" id="jsProxy" type="hidden"><div id="refHTML"></div>d narcissisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08292662191767574589noreply@blogger.com1